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Swingers Guide


What Might I Dislike About Swinging?

If you are uncomfortable with people being sexually attracted to
you and/or flirting with you, then you might be uncomfortable at
swinging events; similarly, if your relationship with your partner is
on shaky ground, you might find seeing him or her flirt or be flirted
with to be an uncomfortable experience. If either of you have hidden
agendas concerning finding a permanent "replacement" for
each other, you’re probably in for a major emotional disaster. If you
and your partner cannot communicate directly about relationships and
sex, you’re probably eventually in for a similarly-sized disaster. In
general, sex can provoke strong feelings along with its many
pleasures; if you aren’t comfortable dealing with emotions, then
perhaps it might be better to wait a little while before exploring
"the lifestyle."

If you are bothered by seeing people have sex without condoms, then
you might want to avoid some of the larger play areas in many on-premises
swinger’s events. Although I have never run into a situation
in the swinging community where my requests to use latex were looked
down on in any way, it is certainly true that not all on-premises
clubs require the use of safer sex precautions. Depending on your
experience with sex-positive communities other than swinging, seeing
others not use latex may be unsettling to you. You should know what
your own standards are with regard to safer sex, and be willing to
articulate them to new people or couples you are about to have sex
with. If your personal safer sex standards include using barriers for
cunnilingus, then you should be prepared to do some explaining as not
everyone will be familiar with this practice.

If you are offended by phobia against bi men, then you should be
prepared to either look for a club that is more open-minded on this
particular issue, wait for attitudes in the community to change (which
I believe may happen in the next five years or so), or else attend
anyway and make a point of not letting small-minded comments go

If you are a single male, you might actually be better off waiting
until you are in a suitable relationship before attempting to become
active in swinging – most swing clubs allow few if any single men to
attend their events.

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